Saturday, August 27, 2011
Body Image & The Shop Sizes
Conventionally I do not fit traditional sizes. Different parts of me are different sizes and across the board, I span three sizes, 8,10 and 12. So as you can imagine, it is fairly hard to find clothing that is the right fit.
I also want a certain style, I want to be modest. I'm not looking to show off my non existent cleavage, I don't want my underwear to be seen through, or over my clothes. I want nice clothes, colourful & floaty (the inner hippy!), I know the colours that suit me and the ones to avoid, but the clothing manufacturers don't or else they are all conspiring against me.
Trousers are my worst nightmare. I have a bottom and hips, but when I try on trousers, I'm made to feel like a freak as I try to balance up the bottom coverage and the excess waist fabric. Mostly my only option is to buy them looking like the photo above (I kid you not) and then to make incisions into the waist band and sew in elastic to draw them in. This then means that my tops need to be forgiving to cover the excess of fabric now bundled around my waist. The low slung trousers of modern fashion are beyond rectifying so are given a wide berth.
I love the gypsy look (the romantic vision rather that the chav) Indian clothing would be great, the colours and styles are fabulous,I have several skirts (elasticated waist) and with then there are no bottom issues. I also have some Salwaar Kameez sets that I love to wear, but on an every day basis I'd get some funny looks.
Dresses tend to look really awful on my scrawny top half when I get a size to accommodate my lower half.
By the time I have carried all the items into the changing rooms, tried them on, realised they are far from ideal and taken them back to the woman at the front, I am feeling deflated, despondant and depressed, especially if I am shopping for something in particular. 28 pairs of trousers in one day and not one remotely right is not a confidence building experience.
There is nothing wrong with my size. It's the way I am made, God blessed me with a bottom and not a top, a bit of mix and match, an eclectic mix? Still there is a blessing that comes out of it all. I don't spend loads and loads of money on clothes, I wear what I have until it is falling to pieces and I am thankful for the clothes I have that have come (nearly) up to my requirements. and afterall, the artist part of me is impulsive, if the creative urge takes me, then out come the paints, the chalks, the glue, the cay, the paste etc and more often than not I just get on with it in the clothes I am currently wearing (what's an apron?)
I know that
God created us, but more specifically he has created us in his image.
‘So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him, male and female he
created them.’ and that the aspects that should be allowed to shine through are kindness, gentleness
mercifulnes, loving, wise, joyful, majestic etc. all the things we are shown about Gods character. So I hope that when people see me in tatty old clothes, they see the colours and style of the image of God rather than the tattyness.